A young and enthusiastic and empathetic feminist man congratulated women who did not need male support. He, of course put up a post saying that the woman he admired most was the protagonist of a Bengali art film shot by Buddhadev Dasgupta. The protagonist looked after her family, was a good neighbour, a loyal friend and had everything needed to have strong shoulders on which the world can lean on. I wrote out a comment on his post, asking him, “don’t you know me?” He put many question marks to convey his confusion. It is obvious that while he can relate to a character in the film, he is unable to recognize the same character in the living world. I, ofcourse put up a post mentioned the women I know who a support to their families have been, well-educated and earned well and independently, neither needing a male approbation nor social approval. While the feminist was receptive to the film, he was completely blind to the reality around him. This is exactly where my problem lies. Is human cognition through the cinematic screen obliterative of the sensibilities of the real world; or does the cinema diminish the sense of reality and real-life perceptions among humans?

Women are invisible as the post mentioned above by the feminist showed. I put up a list of women who I know have been free of men, been in the world of men because men had vacated those spaces, run away from looking after their parents, or not earned enough and so on. Women, without men are rendered invisible through the lenses created by the society and more so if they inhabit and often rule the men’s world. The social media is an interesting place to follow stuff; single women who post about sex and lust do better in terms of career opportunities than women who don’t advertise themselves. Married women do so much better when they post pictures of their spouses and children. Men do better when they post pictures of their work, women who post stuff about work are mostly ignored unless those posts contain pictures of them being in five-star hotels or with politicians and industrialists. Women in male spaces become gender neutralized, useful but unnecessary. Women, who on the other hand show off their desires in some way or the other are desired by society. This is called patriarchy.

Women do not need rights, women need their sexualities to be legitimized. That’s what women’s movements are about. This explains why there was not a single post in India on why women’s share in the workforce was declining, because women as workers are supposed to be an illegitimate category, work neutralizes the gender of women. Sex makes the woman into a woman; hence her trials and tribulations is all about desiring sex and being respected for that desire.